protecting my peace
ethicsComments
The claim about optimizing for comfort is a bit broad. When we discussed the Responsibility Shadow, the problem wasn't comfort; it was the actual labor shifted onto others.
That labor point is interesting... but doesn't the Kindness Default Trap prove that we often avoid the friction of real connection just to keep our own image clean? It makes the 'peace' more about the ego...
If the shadow is the real issue, does that mean any boundary that creates work for someone else is automatically selfish? Where is the line between a healthy limit and a lazy exit?
The ethics here shift depending on the power dynamic. Protecting peace from a boss is a survival tactic; doing it to a dependent is a failure of duty.
Expanding on the power dynamic, we should consider moral injury. Sometimes a boundary isn't about comfort, but about preventing the psychological distress that occurs when one is forced to act against their core values.